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The Today File

Your guide to the latest news from around the Northwest

June 6, 2014 at 6:00 AM

Purloined sirloins, and other stuff you might have missed this week

This wasn’t the most, ahem, appetizing week of news… but it was definitely a weird one.

Read on for some of the most bizarre stories published this week on seattletimes.com.

1 Dog-poop diversions

He couldn’t exactly grab the bag from the seat-back pocket.

Benny the Boxer stands with his owner, Spencer Norris, in the dog lounge at the Dexter Horton Building in downtown Seattle in May. (Photo by Bettina Hansen / The Seattle Times)

Benny the Boxer stands with his owner, Spencer Norris, in the dog lounge at the Dexter Horton Building in downtown Seattle in May. (Photo by Bettina Hansen / The Seattle Times)

A service dog had a bit of an accident in the aisle of a plane headed from Los Angeles to Philadelphia, and the plane had to make an unscheduled landing after the smell made other passengers sick.

This might not have been an issue in Seattle’s historic Dexter Horton building, where dogs can now visit a brilliantly odorless indoor lounge featuring artificial grass and a fire hydrant. This is the same building that had the first centralized lavatories in an office building in the West. Always innovating. …

In related news, a man is in deep doo-doo for burning a bag of his own feces behind the Seattle Police Department’s East Precinct.

2 A sandwich with mayo, mustard ... and saliva?

A cook in New Mexico has been charged with battery after multiple people reported seeing her lick food she was preparing before serving it.

The woman was working at a facility that trains state corrections employees. She is accused of licking slices of cheese before putting them on sandwiches, and of sucking on an ice cube before putting it in a drink.

3 SPD: Thief caught with purloined sirloins

Seattle police say suspected meat thief was caught red-handed with this haul of ripped-off ribs and purloined sirloins. (Seattle police photo)

Seattle police say a suspected meat thief was caught red-handed with this haul of ripped-off ribs and purloined sirloins. (Seattle police photo)

Prosecutors will try to build a meaty case against a man who was arrested last week after police said they saw him pushing a shopping cart full of stolen beef.

The 13 packages of meat would have cost $263 at the QFC from whence they came.

Raw meat was also part of a woman’s alleged attack on the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure crowd on Sunday.

Back from a long shift at work, she told police she was fed up with the noise outside her apartment building. Cops had seen a woman tossing garbage out a fifth-floor window, and found a trash bag on the street filled with 5 to 10 pounds of cat litter and feces.

None of that hit the race crowd. However, a man was doused with a green liquid and a 13-year-old girl was pelted in the back with a frozen chicken breast.

4 Portland strip-club tours

Ah, Portland. Seattle’s little sister to the south has lots to offer: an impressively huge bookstore, food trucks galore, delicious doughnuts … and possibly the most strip clubs per capita of any major city.

A bus company there is looking to cash in on this fact by offering a tour of these establishments.

Customers will be taken to five strip clubs for $40 (we’re guessing tips for the strippers are not included).

5 Fish fright

A highlight from our Picture This blog

Photographer Bettina Hansen used a tilt-shift camera to shoot a neat collection of images for a summer feature story on Seattle tourist attractions. This one reminds us that while a flying fish is common in these parts, it can still freak out a Californian.

Sheila Nunez, visiting from California, shrieks as fishmonger Ryan Yokoyama catches a fish over her head by request at the world-famous Pike Place Fish Market. (Photo by Bettina Hansen / The Seattle Times)

Sheila Nunez, visiting from California, shrieks as fishmonger Ryan Yokoyama catches a fish over her head by request at the world-famous Pike Place Fish Market. (Photo by Bettina Hansen / The Seattle Times)

Click here to read the story about five famous Seattle spots and five less-known alternatives to try this summer. Then, read Bettina’s rebuttal, in which she embraces the cheesy fun of being a tourist in our own town.

Comments | More in List, Roundups, Weird news | Topics: dogs, feces, fish

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